We got through that part, and we got through the next part, too.
Then, prematurely and over-enthusiastically (probably due to the nature of his state, which didn’t even seem to be in Michigan), the guy who was supposed to be marrying us announced in Jeff’s direction, “You may kiss the bride!”
By now Jeff had significant rows of scowling creases on his forehead. He also had the where-with-all to stop that nonsense in its track by not-so stage whispering, “The rings! The. Rings!”
We got through that part.
One of the funniest professional photos in my official wedding album is the one where the best man and the matron of honor are assembled to sign as witnesses to the marriage. There’s my sister-in-law not looking pleased, holding out her hand, demanding the pen from Dr. Dinglefritz in a “Give. Me. The Pen.” gesture. My brother is earnestly leaning forward, balancing on 3 fingers deliberately placed on the table. Our best man seems unsure, which is well warranted.
When we left the festivities that evening, we weren’t even sure we were really married.
When the marriage certificate arrived, I was relieved to note it was indeed valid
Jeff just shrugged and said, “See? I told you everything would work out.” Then, added “Wort.”
Quote for the Week:
Bonus: It Was Supposed to Go Like This:
JEFFREY SCOTT KORTE & JODI ANN SELIN WEDDING, OCTOBER 1, 2001
Opening Words by Minister:
Good afternoon, let me please introduce myself, I am DR (sic) Dinglefritz, I am an ordained minister and it is my pleasure to incorporate the beliefs of both JEFF KORTE and JODI ANN SELIN in the wedding service and to thank you for honoring them with your presence today. Thank you for the friendship and support that you have given them in the past. Their wedding today will be a moment when all our thoughts are turned toward love and joy.
Minister: God, our hearts are overflowing with happiness on this special day–JEFF and JODI’s wedding day. Thank you for bringing them together and for directing them every step of the way as they made their marriage plans. Thank you also for these their friends who have come to celebrate these moments with them.
Bless their marriage and the home that they are establishing
together. Help them to continue to grow in their love for each other. Make them thoughtful and understanding helpmates and companions. Guide them and walk beside them during all their days together as husband and wife.
Giving in Marriage:
Who presents this woman to be married to this man? (Response from Bride’s father) “Her mother and I do.” (This part was silent, but there was waving.)
Minister: Today’s reading chosen by the Bride and Groom; Eskimo love song
You are my husband/you are my wife,
My feet shall run because of you. My feet, dance because of you.
My heart shall beat because of you.
My eyes, see because of you.
My mind thinks because of you.
And I shall love because of you.
Vows: (This was the Give. Me. The Book. part)
GROOM Will you, JODI, take my hand and explore with me the limitless wonders of this world?
BRIDE I will.
BRIDE JEFF, will you promise to share with me your own discoveries and new perspectives on life?
GROOM I will. Will you work with me to broaden our horizons continually and expand the boundaries or our lives?
BRIDE I will. Will you live with me to the fullest, for all the days we share?
GROOM I will. Then I, JEFF, offer to you, JODI, all that I am, all that I may encounter, and all that I may become. I will always offer to you support, friendship, and peace. Let us explore together the infinity of our love from this day forward.
BRIDE I, JODI, question no part of your commitment, recognize no darkness that we cannot vanquish with open hearts, and accept you as my partner above all others. I pledge before this company to love and cherish you forever as my husband in acknowledgment of the miracle of us.
I come to you pure of heart and sound of mind. From this day forward we will walk in peace, live by God’s word, and trust in his blessings. If these include the joy of children, we will raise them in His sight and under His hand.
Wedding song: “In this Life…”
Lighting of the Candles:
Minister: We now come to the lighting of the Candles of Unity. We ask that the mother’s of both the Bride and Groom light the two smaller candles representing the individual lives of the Bride and Groom. They then pass them to their son and daughter.
JODI and JEFF in lighting the Unity candle you signify to yourselves and to the whole world that the two of you will forever be as one.
Minister: At this time we welcome the new bride’s brother, to assist in the breaking of the glass ceremony.
BROTHER OF THE BRIDE: It is my pleasure to bring to you the symbolic Breaking of the Glass The shattering glass reminds us that even at the height of personal joy, it is our duty to recall the sadness and tragedy in the world around us. The glass is shattered with the implication that the marriage shall always remain intact.
Jeff, I present this glass to you with joy.
Jodi and Jeff may your marriage be as strong and complete as it would be difficult to unshatter this symbolic glass
Minister: May I have the rings, please?
Minister: JODI and JEFF, may your love be as eternal as the unbroken infinity of the rings you are about to exchange.
GROOM With this ring, I thee, wed.
BRIDE And, with this ring, I thee, wed.
Minister: At this time it is my pleasure by the authority of the Universal Life Church of the State of California and the laws of the State of Michigan to pronounce you husband and wife.
You may kiss the Bride
Ladies and Gentlemen may I present to you: MR and MRS JEFF KORTE